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Together or Separate: An Update

So…apparently, if you drag your  feet long enough, certain decisions are made for you. (Remember the agonizing over keeping Burke and Maggie separate or together in school?)

We received Burke and Maggie’s teacher assignments about a week ago. Burke has Mrs. O. in room 10 and Maggie has Ms. S. in room 6. I think I’m okay with this decision. (This decision that was made for me…) I mean, sure it would be so much easier on me if they were together, but I really think Burke will thrive by himself. He needs to learn how to stand on his own a bit. And Maggie is already saying “WOO HOO!! New friends!!” So she’s going to be just fine.

I did find out that one of the little girls in their preschool class will be in Burke’s class. They weren’t necessarily good friends, but they’re both a bit shy, so they might gravitate toward each other that first week or so. I’m glad he has that. (The preschool is in a different town, so there aren’t many kids from my town who go to it.)

One of the little girls from Maggie’s dance class will be in Maggie’s class. I’m happy about that as well. And another little girl from her dance class will be in Burke’s class – so, not someone he directly knows, but I think after a play date or two over the summer (in all my spare time 😉 ), they’ll be all good and she will at least be a face he recognizes.

Wonder if this is as stressful on them as it is on me….


Still mulling things over about keeping Burke and Maggie together or separate in Kindergarten next year. (Thanks to everyone who commented!! 🙂 )

There are a few updates. I asked them both what they wanted to do. Maggie’s immediate, no hesitation response was “Separate!” Burke’s was “Together!” then “Separate!” then “Together!” I’m not sure why I’d expect him to know when I don’t have a clue 😉

I asked their preschool teacher what she thought. Her immediate response was “Oh, Kindergarten is tough! You want them together. Plus, that’s better for your sanity.”

Whoo boy.

I chatted with Mrs. Teacher for a while about it and told her all of my conflicting thoughts…and ended up conflicting her as well LOL! She actually told me that the kids are getting more independent … and not eating lunch together as I had thought. And that they almost always do their own thing … unless Burke gets up in Maggie’s face to bug her a bit. (No wonder Maggie wants separate 😛 )

I also had the thought that maybe Burke wouldn’t be so up in Maggie and Logan’s faces if he had his OWN time for a while. That may be wishful thinking since he seems to really enjoy wrestling with them…especially when they don’t want to. (ya, I have my happy hat on about THAT one…we’re working on it.)


Ah, the age-old school-aged question that faces every twin mom. Do I separate my kids in Kindergarten or keep them together? I’ve been back and forth so many times, I’ve lost count. And I have good arguments for both sides. (I have selfish ones as well 😉 )

I was talking with the principal and vice principal of their new school today…asking what they “normally” do with twins. Their initial response was to separate them – not knowing that they’re boy/girl twins…but that didn’t seem to matter. I’m supposed to send a note into school with what we want, so I figured I’d try to work through it here. 🙂

I think if they were both boys or both girls, I’d be inclined to say “Separate!” with no hesitation. (I think.) However, I don’t see that they’ll be compared as much or be in quite the same competition since they’re one of each. (I could be totally wrong about that though.) Plus, I’ve already seen in preschool that they have their own go-to friends, so I don’t have to worry about that. However, I’ve also seen that they most often sit together at lunch and at snack…I don’t know if they’d have that chance if they were in separate classes (something to ask, I guess).

My “selfish” reasons for keeping them together: One teacher to deal with instead of two (because you know I’ll be in there asking questions 😉 ). One homework assignment or project to deal with instead of two (although, this could be a flip argument – more on that later). I can ask Maggie about Burke’s day and Burke about Maggie’s day (even if that’s not entirely fair…). When their birthday comes around, if they ask for a big party, it’s ONE class to invite and not two (or even one party and not two).

Non-selfish reasons: It’s a new school and together might make that transition easier (except, if they weren’t twins, they wouldn’t have that crutch…). They might LIKE to be in the same class (perhaps I should ask them).

Reasons for separating them: They wouldn’t ever be compared and that competition thing wouldn’t be there (although what usually ends up happening is Burke competes and Maggie has no idea he’s doing so…). They’d have separate assignments and projects so there’d be no copying and I’d be able to tell where each has their own strengths and weaknesses (I already have a pretty good idea of those, but I know things change).

Comments? Suggestions? Ideas?