Right before Christmas, I bought new shoes for Burke and Maggie to wear to church. Maggie’s are cute (fake) patent leather-type ones that look cute with dresses and dressier clothes. Burke’s are dark, no character, not-quite sneaker sneakers. I’ve been letting Burke wear his new shoes to school because well, it just makes sense. I have only been letting Maggie wear her’s when she’s got dressier-type clothes on because, well – they’ll just look silly with jeans or sweats!
This morning, Maggie got really upset that Burke could wear his new shoes and she couldn’t. I promised that while she was at school, I’d go out and get her some new sneakers (because, frankly, her old ones stink.) That calmed her down enough to get everyone to school.
Logan and I hit Target and I got Maggie new sneaks. Burke was livid. He wanted new shoes too – even though the ones on his feet are pretty much brand-spankin’ new. *sigh*
So now I’m wondering – do I always have to get BOTH of them something new at the same time? Are they ever going to “get” that sometimes one of them will need something that the other one won’t? (So…what just pops into my head?? Will Burke want a bra when it’s time to get Maggie one?? LOL whoo boy.)
Filed under: mean mommy, twins | Tagged: both at once, new shoes |
The Zimmer Zoo 
No, you don’t have to get them both something every time. My two girls are very competetive and we have this issue all the time! They ask but they do not receive! And, they don’t ask very hard if you know what I mean. They know that when there are three kids in a family, someone always needs something and that is the kid who gets it! Now, if it is a little love treat, I get them all something but if it is a need, like shoes, just the one who needs it, gets it.
BTW, too funny about the bra! I’ll let you know when that comes up at our house!
They will always want what the other has, but that doesn’t mean they’ll get it. One way we’ve taught the boys about money and budgeting is with shoe buying. Right now, the boys shoes run anywhere between $45-$65 and we just can’t afford to buy everyone new shoes! So, the oldest (who has a job during the summer) pays half if he wants the $65 pair. The middle child knows how much we’re able to spend, and thankfully, the youngest doesn’t care…yet. I still could go to Payless for his shoes. We usually do get all new shoes for the upcoming school year, but haven’t always followed that tradition, either, if the current shoes are fine.
So, I guess the answer is, yes, they’ll always want it, but use the “no” as a teaching tool and explain why the no is no.
I have four kids. I have always told the older three that, “They all don’t get something each time we go to the store.” I tell them that they will have to wait for their turn. All of them understand that, but that doesn’t mean they like it. People in general are very jealous and competitive. It sucks, but it is true. Just tell them as best as you can. If you don’t nip it in the bud now though, you will have problems later. Good luck!!
Good Luck. I’ve been trying to win this game for, um 7 years. I don’t have an answer. But let me tell you about the trip to Bldg 19 in October to buy use ski stuff for the twins…..we ended up leaving with a 3rd pair for little guy. sigh.
Let me know if you figure out how to solve THIS problem!